Happy 7th anniversary, baby!

By Kathy G.

Seven years ago today, I did something that turned out to be the smartest thing I've ever done in my life: I got married. The past seven years, plus the three before that that my husband and I were together, have been the happiest of my life by far. And since deep down I never believed I ever really would find happiness, I feel extraordinarily blessed. It's something of a miracle to me, still.

The joys I've experienced in my relationship with my husband are countless. But today I'll write about just one of them: a deeper appreciation of the genius of Frank Sinatra.

I knew from the beginning that my husband was a Sinatraphile. It was right there in the letter he sent in answer to my personal ad. It was such an erudite and beautifully written letter that I knew right away I had to put it in the "keeper" pile. I was a little worried, though: the writer didn't give his age, and he mentioned his love for Sinatra tunes. This, I assumed, must mean that he was considerably older than me -- by 20 years at least, I reckoned. But then again -- the letter was so great. All right, I'll give him a shot, I decided.

As it happened, he was actually a bit younger than me. And he turned out to be even more wonderful in person than his letter had been.  We hit it off on the very first date. When we both started talking about our mutual obsession with Richard Nixon, we knew it was love.

And yes, we are officially the two biggest nerds on the planet.

As our relationship grew, we developed a new mutual obsession: Frank Sinatra. I'd already been a fan, of course -- how can you be a lover of American popular music and not be? Especially if you're from Jersey and you have an Italian grandma who grew up in Hoboken and who'd claimed she'd turned down a chance to date Frank Sinatra. (My beloved Nana, may you rest in peace, but I have to confess I never did buy that story).

But through my hubby, I was introduced to many Sinatra recordings that either I'd never heard, or had never listened to very closely. And I was astonished, particularly when I listened to the dark, anguished albums Sinatra had made in the 50s following his devastating break-up with Ava Gardner: In the Wee Small Hours, Where Are You?, and Only the Lonely. I don't think he was ever a greater singer than in those albums. There was a beauty, an aching tenderness, and an emotional depth there that he never quite equaled anywhere else -- though of course he made plenty of other absolutely wonderful music.

So the man who became my husband and I would frequently listen to Frank together. We'd watch his movies. We each devoured, in turn, a book that has to rank among the most gloriously trashy literary masterpieces of all time: Mr. S: My Life with Frank Sinatra, a memoir written by Sinatra's manservant, George Jacobs. It  has been said that "no man is a hero to his valet," and rarely has there been a more vivid illustration of that maxim. Except, Sinatra clearly still is the hero of that book, in spite of himself. Anyway, if you have any interest whatsoever in Sinatra, show business, or the master/slave dialectic, you must read it. You can thank me later.

So yes -- we listened to Sinatra together. And we arranged it so that lots of Sinatra was played at our wedding. In fact, the very first song we had played was "The Best is Yet to Come." We both love the brash, bold, "we're taking the world by the balls and you can't stop us" gusto of that one.

I wanted to close this post with a Youtube video of Sinatra performing that tune, but unfortunately I couldn't find one. However, I did find a different video I really liked. It's of Sinatra circa 1970 1971, singing the great Harold Arlen/Johnny Mercer tune, "One for My Baby."

What do I love about this video? Well, first of all, there's the song. "One for My Baby" has got to be one of the all-time classic American songs. It's probably the greatest song ever written about what F. Scott Fitzgerald called the "three o'clock in the morning" time of the soul.

And then, of course, there is Frank. What I love about this video is that it gives you the Full Frank. It's fairly late in his career. He's wearing a really bad toupee. He starts off with crude banter that includes the typical corny jokes and casual sexism. But then he opens his mouth to sing, and suddenly he's an artist -- one of the greatest, I believe, that 20th century America produced. His voice has seen better days at this point, but he still absolutely nails the emotional content of the song. It's a beautiful thing to see.

I also love the way he casually lights up a cigarette and starts smoking it mid-tune.

This one's for you, baby. Happy anniversary!

UPDATE: Commenter Bloix points us to this absolutely wonderful video of a much younger Sinatra singing the same song. His voice was in much better shape at that point and he was able to achieve more subtle effects. It's probably more interesting musically, just as the later clip is more interesting performance-wise. I highly recommend them both!

Thank you, Bloix, and thanks to all of you for your kind wishes.

Comments

[Lance Mannion]

Corngrats, Mr and Mrs G, and many happy returns of the day and many many more hours of listening to Frank!

[MG]

Sinatra was never about his voice, anyway. I think he did his best work in his 50s, when he wasn't trying to be a superstar or build his career any more, had made his stash and his name, and could just enjoy singing songs as well as he could -- which was pretty damn good.

[Bloix]

It's a great, great song. And even in this late, mannered, performance the emotion comes through. If you haven't seen it, there's a TV version featuring a much younger Sinatra singing it straight. I prefer it to this one, although there's something to be said for the growl he's developed. It's interesting to see how he exaggerates for the stage as compared to the TV screen. He does the cigarette thing in the earlier one, too. It makes me regret having quit smoking 15 years ago. How I did love all the little gestures you could make with a cigarette.
http://www.dartblog.com/data/2006/11/006624.php

Congratulations on your anniversary. There is nothing in the world like a good marriage. And thanks ever so much for the blog.

[cr]

Congratulations on your anniversary. My husband is a Sintraphile too and we've had so much fun introducing our 2 year old son to some of his music. We both lived in Hoboken too so it was all Frank, all the time. We also used to go see his granddaughter (Nancy's daughter) perform. Thanks for bringing back some wonderful memories of listening to Sinatra with my husband.

[arbitrista]

How sweet. Happy anniversary!

[Klug]

Congratulations and it's a very, very lovely song. What was the next "new" song?

[CLBetley]

Congratulations!

So basically, you're saying Sinatra is the Bruce Springsteen of the 50s? :)

[Henry]

Comparisons are often pointless, so all I will say is check out Fred's version in "The Sky's The Limit," where he not only dances while drunk, but breaks up the bar as well. And did a fine job with a weaker voice, but just as much feeling.